As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
This is a story about something good like Poulan 2000 chainsaws which are no more. This is a story which includes my dead brother buying me a coat, not while he was dead as that would be a most interesting story. This is just a story about staying warm.
So it worked out that my dead brother bought me a coat as “he worked behind the gun counter at Cabelas”, a place I told him to take, but he snotted off and said, “I work in the sporting goods department”. Idiot wised up and killed himself over that job, the wise part is he liked being behind the gun counter as he was a know it all and it validated him for the first time in his life as all gun counter types think they know everything and like holding people hostage who are stupid.
So the coof hit, he took the vax, got lite cancer, cured it, then went back and took the booster which killed him of numerous things in 2 weeks. This was after he bought me the coat, a woman’s coat from Cabelas as the mother had given him some money he did not want, so he bought me a coat and her a stupid deer lamp.
I hate Cabelas for being overpriced. As Echo says now, Cabelas is shit as Bass Pro took it over and they have no heavy duty clothing. You get that from rednecks in Arkansas.
Anyway, so my Cabelas coat got holes in it hanging in the closet. Yes piss poor outer shell which Cabelas would do nothing about. Assholes, yes.
So my coat wore out in the outer sell to rags which embarrassed even me, but it was a 20 below coat. So I looked for an outer shell to sew on…….85 to 130 dollars. That was not happening for canvase.
So got to looking on Ebay and found they were selling a number of these relics. The one pictured above is about standard in some rich asshole who probably steals by reading blogs and does not support them, is in Chicago and dies, pretending they are a hunter or outdoor type, and they wash the fricking coat every time they take a walk, so it looks like it has been overwashed, and they die, their kids have a garbage sale to get rid of shit and get some coin off the dead guy, and they sell this shit for 5 bucks. Someone grabs it, or grabs the pile of shit going to the dumpster, and puts it on Ebay where they make up for in no one wanting the price they have on it, but charging big shipping.
That is where we are now.
Here is the inside tag so you know the model. Mine is a vulva one so these is a 6 on the end not a 5 for a penis coat.
I figure this will end times last me till Jesus comes back. Then maybe he can raise the coats from the dead, but I hear the climate is going to be nice, so I won’t need a coat. Maybe the puppies will like laying on them.
I think Dickey, Carhartt, Berne and whoever else is out there now has shit for warm coats. Too expensive and too light. This one at least measures up. I could not even find a Chinaman to sew a shell on this coat……..or build me a 1960’s kid corduroy coat that would make me a blimp. Chinamen do not want to work.
You wear like a quilted flannel shirt under this thing and you are good to go in the worst weather most of you will ever face. I dug that shirt out of the dirt in the junk pile as evil uncle did not want it as the zipper was broke. Keep wanting to get rid of it, but it sticks around. Can not afford the 12 bucks for a zipper to fix the stupid thing. I have better but am not going to waste things as that is my creed in you don’t drive the Rolls Royce to goose hunt. That is what the Ford is for.
Speaking of which as the gas pump, my dead brothers fucktard twin was there. Pulled in with his goose hunting trailer. So he takes up two spots and won’t pull ahead so I am cussing his stupid ass as he knows what a fuck head he is. I get out, he is talking on his phone like Kirk in the communicator from Stat Trek. Conversation was something like, “We went to the meat market. Do you want us to meet you at the furniture store?”
NO I would like you to not have shit for brains and GAS UP BEFORE YOU PULL YOUR TRAILER AROUND TOWN pretending you a big goose hunter with your lab dog which would love to kill you as you leave it in the kennel all the time, but you got your goose trailer and your 200 Big Foot decoys.
I told TL, “Beloved Uncle had 12 decoys, dug a pit, shot his goose in a half hour went and had breakfast and no one ever knew he was goose hunting. Brother though had to show off as that made him someone. Got him killed though over a damn job that no one cares he worked at corporate.
I wonder if I get some brown dye I could spiff this coat up and not run dye all over me like in one big tattoo.
Nuff Said
agtG
CLICK HERE to support the popular girl