So like I'm sitting here making coffee cake, right. You know for the Tiger Lily and myself when we rendezvous and I got to thinking about things in experiments and stuff. You know I experiment on the Tiger Lily in forcing them to eat the things I make and they are really tolerant of my oddities as I get off on cooking, cake pans with slide off lids, things stainless steel and cast iron, compared to porn, dope, booze and sports.
Any way, so I'm baking this German coffee cake of my own invention which I have mentioned and today I was using my beat to hell food processor.
Now do not think I just have beat to hell stuff, but I use my beat to hell one to save my good one, and to not use my brand new one, so I always have spares.
Is something about me, in I like in most things to have a main one, a back up one and a back up one to the back up one........helps when one designs things for lunar shots or for Mars landings as then you tend to not go tits up in being a cosmonaut or being suicide mission to Mars.
So I put these bread crusts in the processor and it really makes a hell of a racket. This pleases me as I just purchased a Jack Apple one for the Tiger Lily to play with which is quiet like hers is.
You know Jack Apple, he is that Jacques Pepin or whatever his name is. Super nice guy from France and super great chef like the Tiger Lily in whatever they cook looks like something from a magazine cover, and mine sort of looks like what the farm wife churns out for the threshing crew.
I digress.......
So I put in the bread crusts, like three of them. Put them into the oven to dry out, and then I put in like a quarter cup of butter and about a cup of brown sugar. I sort of eye ball things as I do not like walking eight feet for a measuring cup. I do pretty good eyeballing things like Roy Underhill.
Damn sight better than them Home Depot wood cutters who cut boards like a fricking half inch longer and shorter than they should be.........have a damn tape measure and radial arm saw and still can't get the fricking job done.
So I digress........
So I mix this up in the food processor and............
Sorry had to go turn off the strawberry jam and check the coffee cake.
So I mix up this mess, and Lord God that food processor is just like Lydian Basti.......you know the buxom gal on Create with Gram from Italy who is the best thing of imports to America in she makes stuff look edible too.
So this is streussel, that topping you put on coffee cake, and of course I made a monstrous amount and put it on the cake and will soon see how things blow there, but I was thinking about Martha the school cook who could turn government rations into deserts to delight and she made great coffee cake.....even if it tasted of powdered eggs and powdered milk.
Her's though is dryer than mine, whiter too. Not that this is about race, as mine is about olive oil and not corn oil, so it is a bit more swarthy, but along with the garden huckleberry sauce I make, it usually turns out great, with a zip lock butter cream frosting decoration on top.
You just cut a tip off the bag and squeeze out a design..........makes you look like a pastry chef and pretty things always taste better than ugly things.
Where was I?
Oh yeah so I did the rhubarb cake stuff too in chopping the rhubarb as the Tiger Lily likes rhubarb cake, and I got that just about done, and I did the streussel topping and then I chopped up some strawberries in my wing ding processor.
Odd things about food processors is they do not chop things without the blade. Mine has a clutch gear slip after making cream cheese, powdered sugar wedding mints, so I just figured it was slipping until I stuck my finger in there, and there was no blade.
Sure you are not to be sticking your fingers into machine with blades, but they do have that auto cut off, but I suppose if it did not cut off it would cut my fingers off or make really crimson strawberries.
You can make this fruit sauce easy, as most groceries have piles of rotting fruit they can not sell, and I put allot of it to good use, and with a cup of sugar to a cup or two of fruit and some stove top cooking time, you get something that will last in a sealed jar for a coons age. Nothing racist in that either as am talking about raccoons.
So I really like food processors. Lydia uses her's for noodle dough and would really like to try that sometime in a processor which worked better. Mine might come out of it's slipping, but it really makes allot of noise. My baby goat really does not appreciate the overture it makes, but I like using crap that holds together so I can look at my pretty stuff and be glad I have a back up for it.
If you give something to people, you should give something you lust after really and not some junk, as God does not like junk. It is allot like seeing a need for a good deed and not doing it, which is a sin.
You know things like that always convict the poor good people into thinking you are lecturing at them, and then they go out and get killed trying to save some crack head.
No, see this is more about the Wall Street Insider putting up the cash for this blog, Ulstermans, The American Thinker, to put it on the radio, as that would be a good deed for America, but he sees it, and instead dumps money into Wisconsin trying to bust unions in buying it, and pretty soon you got Obama skinheads capping Sikh's.
Those Sikh's really have no lead capacity as that skinhead for Obama socialism was using a 9 mm. That is really a poor choice for someone who was in the military. I don't know if it was like Gabby Giffords shooter was supposed to be serving up rubber bullets and the BATF mole didn't get the rubber tree, but you know it would all be much more civilized if they left those Wisconsin Cheeseheads alone and just gave the money to Irish folks like Ulsterman and your darling me.
You know Ulsterman is not going to shoot any batman gathering up, because he knows what it is like to be distracted in the market as a pretty girl walks by and an operative sprays his food with Nancy Pelosi ass fat giving him food poisoning.
Well was not spraying to say, but like an injection is the protocol, but just the same, if Ulsterman was uber wealthy you know he would not go terrorist like Obama. Some people can handle money, and some people just need plastic forks at Obama events.
You know if Obama would just serve watermelon and fried chicken at events, they would not have a need to disarm his backers of forks and knives...........
Of course, there was that one time that guinea hen ......or was that a turkey wishbone was used to kill that one terrorist..........two stories I must be mixing up in the guinea hen was a leg bone in Africa and the turkey wish bone was in the Ukraine.......hard to keep track of this stuff.
Time to check the cakes........
OK rhubarb is done, burned my knuckle.........coffee cake looks great, but is still soft in the middle in jello jiggle.........so will be a few.
So a food processor by Hamilton Beach is a really nice thing, and HB should send me a million dollars for this advertisement, but then Rush Limbaugh owes me 11 million plus interest and the Wall Street Insider has that big Obama debt........any event I like cooking and making things as my things are so much better than the things usually around.
Think I will stop there.
agtG
