Friday, December 30, 2016

The Big House

As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.

I  actually live among rich people like most of you do. Actually my rich people are farmers, whose sir names are all for some reason, Dumb Ass Farmers. It is odd in Dumb Ass appears in my vocabulary before Farmers in naming them, and for some reason, no one ever says, "Is that Dumb Ass Farmer 1, 2 or 3", because we all know who we are talking about as we drive by and say, "That Dumb Ass Farmer".

It is not just farmers ok, Is see allot of Dumb Ass Dentists, Dumb Ass Doctors, Dumb Ass Teachers. I never see Dumb Ass Bloggers though as I rarely look in the mirror and I do not have the big donation to be like other Dumb Asses.

Take for example the subject of Dumb Ass Farmers 1 and 2 who TL and I drive by and I am constantly cussing for being dumb asses.

Ok we can be a bit more adjectivtudinal about this, so you can keep up, as Dumb Ass #1 is Dumb Ass Baptist Farmer and Dumb Ass #2 is Dumb Ass Doper Farmer.

So Dumb Ass Baptist is a holier than though Baptist who saves people to employ in his dairy. I think that is one doper he saved. Otherwise he is importing Mexican slave labor to milk cows and mow his lawn.
For some reason, the Baptists think that building homes on God forsaken land. The kid is in a weed patch overlooking a brush patch draw, and the old man is on a hill in a million dollar brick house ........I will get to what he overlooks in a bit.

So the million dollar mansion took 3 years to build. You should probably stop by for a stay as I was told the bank forgave a 500,000 dollar loan the Baptist could not repay, so the house is half paid for by all of us.

So any way, the mansion is this chicken shit brown thing, with bricks.......three stories, more windows than Trump Tower and it looks like shit.
They do fly the American flag though. Probably to keep the Border Patrol from raiding them in Little Mexico.

So any way, like I said, the Baptist mansion overlooks a crick a half mile away. That is ok as the other Dumb Ass Baptist kid just built a half a million dollar home in a slough, which literally has a bean field off the basement and a dirt pile off the front door.
Honest to God, I can not figure out these rich people who build a mansion on top of another house, instead of buying some acreage, or if they have acreage, they never landscape, but instead have a combine blowing corncobs through their picture windows.

So, we are at the overlook, and this is the middle of nowhere, with a shitty view......which gets worse, because Dumb Ass Doper had this step kid who decided to start a fire in his closet and burned the mansion down his dad gave him.
So Dumb Ass Doper living in a wildlife paradise, had the entire world to build upon..........yes you guessed it, Dumb Ass Doper, built his rather chicken shit brown 500,000 dollar domicile on the hill, which is a gravel pit, right in front of the Dumb Ass Baptist mansion. So the Baptist is looking at a less value house for their view now, with the whole blessed country to build in.

The gravel pit is interesting in my dad almost got killed there as a little boy in a cave in. A nice guy rescued him from the collapse but was crushed. Someday I am going to tell those Dumb Ass Dopers that they built their mansion where a man died, and ask if they have any problems as if you drive by on some nights, you can see his ghost moving around there.
Of course it is a lie, but I do not like this prick for driving through my fence hunting deer a few years ago, so what could be better to tell those morons a ghost is haunting their yard to scare the hell out of them. I suspect they will sell out and move.

Ok so this gets better as you got the Dumb Ass Baptist with the million dollar mansion, and the 500,000 dollar Dumb Ass Doper mansion. Guess what Dumb Ass Doper just built on the mound right in front of Dumb Ass Baptist mansion?
Why Doper built a metal shed, and not just any metal shed, but a chicken shit brown metal shed, with two huge doors, that you could literally fit the 500,000 dollar mansion inside of it.

I mean what could be everything a person could want right? You spend a fortune on a nice home with a wildlife view, so why not stick a big blessed tin shed in it to look at.

The Baptists must be furious and seething, which does delight me immensely, as I would be so pissed to spend a million on my retirement home, to have Doper village appear on my front door.

There are things like esthetics. Things like you do not build chicken shit brown homes.  You do not go cheap and not put on shutters and things so your mansion does not look ugly ass. There are things like when you have steel sheds up the ass on your other farms, you don't build one on your doorstep, bigger than your house.......and in front of your pissed off neighbors who spent a fortune on their home to show off, so they do not want a tin shed out their picture windows.

My brother in law has shit for brains too. For some reason his cabin at the lake is like all things he does, in he had this nice cabin, but on the lot, built a metal shed which filled up most of the lot and you could fit 3 cabins in the thing.
The neighbors were I am sure furious as most sold out, as everyone likes having a cabin at the lake to find a huge storage shed on your property line which you can not see around.

One just builds things to scale to accent and not impose.

That though is the saga of the rich people I watch building mansions. I could go on about the Mexican employer who just got his ass kicked out of his own company, so now he can sit in his mansion looking at tin sheds too, but it would be like repeating a story.
Yes let us build a million dollar home with 3 garages, but wait....let's build a tin shed bigger than the house to loom over the entire vista.

Most rich people are not Donald Trump with taste. Most rich people are Dumb Asses and Lord God I have numbers of dumb asses to study here...........including the two boobs who built pole sheds which are both puke green and live in them.....along with the pigeons that roost there.