As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
The Lame Cherry is disappointed, in all the work the Lame Cherry has engaged in to help Ben Affleck, having things yet to be published on the subject which are monumentally important, and in all of this, the man whore gambling drunk, Ben Affleck is nothing but fat and old like Al Gore and a quitter like Jimmy Carter, as Affleck wants to quit Batman after he ruined the franchise.
A few more weeks passed and all seemed calm on the Affleck front — until a bombshell revelation this week: the “Batman” star wants to hang up the suit.
Insiders at Warner Bros. told Collider Movie Talk that Affleck “doesn’t want to be Batman anymore” and that he had been “talking with Warner Bros. in an attempt to get out of” playing the part.
On Friday, it was reported that Garner was getting ready to finally file for divorce from Affleck. The couple split after 10 years of marriage amid reports that Ben had been cheating on the “Juno” actress with their nanny.
Obviously as Mr. Jennifer Garner has a drunk nurse on duty to monitor him, it is time for an Affleck Intevention, and it begins with an intervention.
The first thing that needs to be considered is the Affleck children must be saved from their sperm donor, and that requires a real man. Granted I do not know of any man who would want to be cast as a father in having to bed Jennifer Garner as part of the deal, but in that, I say, let us cast Tim Allen to be father to the Affleck children to give them a semblance of manilness and Americanness, which Mr. Allen will provide.
For a man in the Jen's life, I cast Robert Davi as his hangnails have more cock and balls, than Ben Affleck's soy milk grown scrotum. That is the kind of man Jennifer Garner needs to fetch a beer for, wear lingerie and be told she is not as horridly stupid and non talented as she is.
It is a sad thing that the only thing the Jen ever did right was divorcing the Ben.
Now for the movie, well I have solved that. I can not go into details as I am certain that Warner Brothers will call, and I have already mentioned Uwe Boll or whatever his name is to direct this, wrote the script and I also have a star who will save the Batman franchise that Ben Affleck destroyed like Obama destroyed Syria, Iraq, Yemen, Libya, Ukraine.........America to utter ruin.
You do know that all Ben Affleck needs is for Ivanna Trump to get out her leather belt and beat his ass raw, tell Ben to get his lazy liberal ass off the couch and quit pouting, as you know Ivanna had the leather strapping around Ivanka, Don jr. and Eric often enough, so those children grew up to be not Ben Affleck.
Ok for those who think Affleck has to be a perv in he would enjoy the punishment as BDSM, rest assured that Ivanna Trump would make sure that old Ben would not have any erection during his ass beating as Slavic women will beat a man so hard that they look like they have two anus, when they are done with them.
So that is how we all reach out and help Ben Affleck. Just replace him with men, and have a Slavic woman beat his ass to make a sort of man out of his debaucherous drunken failure.
Oh and a warning to Ivanna, please do not beat Ryan Reynolds as that loser is often mistaken for Affleck......on second thought, he could use a good Slavic whoopin' too as he made a career impersonating that prick Chevy Chase, and no one should allow themselves to get lusted over by little Obama girls in the White House, as we do not want to create Affleck II in another Batman reincarnation of a faggy Batman ruining the franchise as Ryan Reynolds.
You did see what Reynolds did to the Green Lantern right? I mean he should have been called the Green Tampon.
See what happens when you hang around with Jimmy Carter, Al Gore and Matt Damon.