Saturday, March 25, 2017

Ivanka's Digs

As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.

As none of us are ever going to get invited to Jared and Ivanka Kirschner's DC Mansion, worth 5.5 million dollars in the Podesta Obama neighborhood, the MSM put some pictures up and as I love house hunting and architecture, the best photos are shown here, so you can see the world Ivanka Trump sees from her office, her bathroom, her patio, backyard, balcony and whatever in this Mount Vernon type colonial home.

We begin the journey beyond the foyer as foyers are boring entryways. You will notice that this house is white, as in white like your dog's mud would show up forever and normal people can not live this way, unless they have a maid who dies trying to keep a place like this clean.

The living room is decorated ugly grey/puce and needs a great deal of heat and color to warm it up.

This is the dining room. It looks like a long haul functioning as a boardroom.

This is some kind of looky loo room on the corner. Once again white, makes me think of freezing my ass off and the view is DC rich, another cold view.

This is the kitchen and kitchen table. I suppose the au pair maid works here as the Kurschner's children are not old enough to cook for them yet in their being at the White House as liberal fixtures. I do like the satan awful stairs though as they are scary looking like they could kill you.
Dire need there of child proofing them with pet gates as children have a gravitational need to plunging down steps.
I do not like the glass barriers, as I know I would bruise myself on them, and kids would fingerprint and our Puntz would forever be licking that cool glass.

This is Ivanka's crapper. Why rich folk want to be put on display while shaving their legs and sudsing up the nethers is not my taste. I also do not want big ass windows showing my shadow or a seat in my crapper to sit on as I preen.

This would be Ivanka's office where she plots carbon taxes with Mike Pence and Bush fam. Probably takes her New York calls here to apologize for her father's American policies, which are what built this mansion in the first place back in the day.

This is the back of the house. Ugly as sin and absolutely nothing redemptive about it.

 They call this the patio. There appear to be two of these sitting areas. Again rich people things, because outside stuff like this rots, is covered with bird shit, dirt, leaves and cat shit or is wet, as the ticks jump on you from the trees. Great ideas if you got people hired to take care of all of these accoutrements.

Lastly, this is the view that Ivanka has in ruling the world. I just know children would decide it would be a great idea to jump off the balcony into the tree, until they almost kill themselves. I would hack that foliage down so I could see and burn it up in the gas fired fireplace to soot things up.

Well now you know what Ivanka Trump sleeps in and eats in, and entertains Rupert Murdoch's Chinese spy ex wife's visits at. I do not know if Ivanka gets to change things as the mansion came this way, but all that damned white is just not for a normal family coming in from doing chores, the dog splashing his dirty ass tail over everything and having to make it all clean looking.

It simply is not homey like George and Martha Washington at Mount Vernon. Mrs. Washington did a wonderful job in making that place warm and cozy.

I would never build anything like this nor reside in something like that. That window corner has one hell of a beam on it to hold up the house as the windows sure as hell are not.
It looks secure enough with Secret Service in machine guns and the front is like a fortress, so I like that part. I just am more of a Melania type girl. No I do not mean Donald's gold plated everything, but Melania just fills a room with things so it seems organized clutter which makes people feel good. She has great color schemes too in decorating.

One day God will move some rich people to donate and we will get our land, and then I will build our home as the design has been in my head for some time. It will not take long for things to fill up at least in my spaces as I like things like that. Mom's place is kind of like pathways in so much stuff, and Puntz simply loves the places to hide.

Ivanka needs some wood wainscoting to give some definition to those rooms, but I doubt she can do a great deal about a rental. I just think a 5.5 million dollar home should have more of something in it. At least something like niggerboy horse fixtures you could tie your pony to.

 Feel bad about that, as a house here in town had two of them on their steps and they finally took them down. They were quite the accent on a red brick house.

Maybe Ivanka can invite Lurch and the image over in red jackets and white pants to be sort of a living display.