Lame Cherry: Room Temperature

As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.

This is your cooking lesson, so you can stop preparing dishes you see pictures of and they look like ambrosia and your's look like turnip crap, which disappoints you, and further disappoints you as everyone in your kind family lies to you, and tries to comfort you with expressions of, "It tastes good.........."

This is your PHD in cooking lesson. It will not require you to be Einstein, as you would probably fail the Jewish test, as you are not wealthy enough to make the Rabbi smile and lie about you.

It is about ROOM TEMPERATURE.

Unless one is making ice cream, room temperature, as long as one is not an Eskimo in an igloo or a half naked savage eating monkeys in the Amazon jungle, you cook at temperate climate room temperature. I realize you have no idea what temperate climate is, as you were either daydreaming in 1950 or have been texting in 2017 AD in the year of our Lord.

Butter must be soft, room temperature, or you have lumps of lard. They melt in ovens, but incorporation is the necessity, as you don't want your lard balls racing around to be absorbed by your flour balls, as it churns your cake up. Cakes must rest in the oven to make nice little air pockets so it is delicate like fairy poo and not like your dog's turd balls.

It is the same with egg whites for incorporation into batter or meringue. You got to have them eggs room temperature, just like crem fresh or whipped cream as normal people call it. Warmth allows the incorporation of air, which gives you the froth you are looking for, or you get flat whipped whites or lard whip. No one wants lard whip on their pie and no one likes taffy tough meringue on their pie. So room temperature. Your menstruation does not flow if you got the chills, so give them eggs and dairy the same treatment as no tampon is going to fix bad meringue or bad lard whip.

Now, you need that same room temperature for your sourdough. Can't be too cold or the chemical reaction will be too slow and you know what you get then? Bread Bricks. No one wants no bread brick for breakfast. Not like you are going to be going to war with them and it would be unChristian wasteful to use food to build a wall, a hearth or a home. Mice would eat it or in a big rain it would dissolve. That just would not do, so you just use your flour for breaking and make good sourdough by making it room temperature to rise appropriately to make a lovely loaf of moisture and texture. And do not go off and turn up the heat. You are not making no Vesuvius volcano with that baking and acid dough.
So no cold mother, no cold flour, no cold bowls as you are making a life form. Don't grow no babies in a refrigerated womb or get an erection from balls that are blue. Room temperature you ignorant overworking your teeth. What do you think you get a third set for free? Room temperature.

Room temperature will have you making glorious looking foods that bring to mind the words ambrosia and not roofing tiles.

That is your lesson, your PHD lesson in cooking.