As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
Sometimes in my maturity, I forget things, like why I do things, but I just do them without thinking or remembering why I am doing things my way.....or better to the point THE RIGHT WAY.
What this is about is mowing lawn, something I hate as the biggest waste of time and fuel on the planet. Yet I see people with neurosis and psychopathy who just can not get enough of that attacking grass, in order to perform an addictive catharsis of making their grass obey them and be manicured, when inside they are all fucked up.
Show me an anal lawmower and I will show you a lawn mowed to hell and gone down to the bone.
This is about my being asked to mow the Uncles lawn on our place. Little did I realize that several of his children had murderous intent toward the grass. The son appeared and promising to cut down a tree, instead drank his daddy's beer and slept in his daddy's bed, because if daddy was not around when he was young, then sonny could crawl into daddy's skin and be as daddy should be.
It didn't work.
So the daughter appeared with the second husband, as the first husband who rode her to being preggo at age 18, was cast aside as she traded up to an early retired state employee who was divorced too, and they drink volumes for hours a day.
When they are not drunk, they apparently have it in for the lawn too.
To set this up, the reason Uncle had me over is, because Uncle likes mowing to the bone too on a lawn. Doing that does one thing, and that thing is it grows weeds. He had about half his lawn in swathes of crab grass, which was upsetting him, so I was enlisted one hot ass day to mow the seed heads off before they matured.
Well, I had been attempting to get some height on that grass, so the weeds would die out, but then the son showed up and was using the mower as a roto tiller, and I had to fix that in sharpening the blades. Being good I was trying to save Uncle some money. Big mistake as son in law appeared, and displaced me as the mower of lawn, as he was apparently bored and daughter was upset I was over there being the best child Uncle ever had.
The Holy Ghost got me thinking though on the drunk in law's mowing, as that Toro mower is set up on 1 to 5. Five being scorched earth. Uncle mowed at 3. When I pulled in to mow, as they had not told me they had decided to change plans, which really pissed me off, I noticed how golf green that lawn looked. You could have putted on that grass as it was so short.
Now short grass is good for golfing, but when you exist in the brier patch you start learning thing from experience, like cattle men learn that sheep eat grass to the dirt and kill it all.
Yes I have let that punchline slip as if you mow grass short here, you get weeds like everywhere, but suddenly it is 95 to 110 degrees and that grass just turns into this crispy brown thing. The thing here is that it does not rain often, and you get a condition where the plants die from being baked in this atmospheric oven.
That is what is setting up with the genius college boy, who looks a bit short, wears a big white cowboy hat as the Lone Ranger obviously had a twin, and his twin is a real grass killer.
Sonny was talking about coming and spraying for bugs, so after being displaced I am not going over there and I wonder what toxic cesspool will be that place in having sprayed everything.
I did notice since those people arrived that the bunnies and birds are all gone. The place felt like it had been raped and was in shock, but that is what happens when serial grass mowers are at it.
I figure my sharpening job on the mower blades are now dull. So they can now lift that mower up and change them, and spend the money as I am done being nice in fixing things that stupid ass childish adults create in disasters.
See this is what I remembered in I got my ass chewed constantly as a kid for being a dumb ass. It was not that I was not dumb, it was just what the hell do you expect from a ten year old kid being put in charge of things they have no experience in. All the kids out here were like that, and got their asses chewed and soon learned to not do stupid ass things, not so much in not getting your ass chewed, but because not figuring things out cost money and destroyed things.
That is is in the son in law and sonny. They are from another state, and have no damn sense as to what the world is. They get away with doing stupid ass shit, because nature forgives them there. Here nature pounds your ass and tries to bury you in the bottom of a hole about five times a day just to keep things interesting.
I will probably have the opportunity to stick the knife in, and I will in this. I will mention about the college genius attempting to kill the lawn, and making things worse of Uncles crab grass and turning the blades on the mower into butter knives again, as I really would enjoy jerking these assholes up by the short chain, as they deserve it.
It is what fools are, and you mix booze with a bunch of delinquents who are shit for brains and think they know it all.
So anal mowing by asstards. What a joy.
Nuff Said
agtG
