I never thought of the Graveside Grillin' though
As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
Who would have figured after the hell the mother put us through that in 2018, in order to get her buried on a budget that the Lame Cherry was setting the first wave of graveside services for the dead.
I noticed after I arranged this ceremony, and people said they liked it, that suddenly number of people started burying their dead without preachers, without the funeral home services and without a Church.
Funerals are expensive as hell, like 1700 bucks to just torch the body. I got stuck for a 7000 dollar bill and that was nothing but he grave, the casket and me doing the work for free. Most funerals are in the 12,000 range for embalming.
Add to that the cost of feeding people after a funeral, and you got some major cash outlays which no one can afford anymore. I imagine all those Corona coofers croaking are getting county ash piles as families just dump the dead on the public graveyard.
That is what is different in the brier patch in the CDC has guidelines in no more than 10 people at a funeral. People sit in cars on the way to the graveyard or they have what I came up with in the old graveside service. I have seen tele conference services too, but that is more high tech than what we have around here as the idiots could not figure out what to click and would probably end up ordering toilet paper off of Amazon.
It is though what is now the trend in what we started. The world is not burying in the Church, but is instead going cheap, and quick in the John Wayne Boot Hill graveside service. I don't even see visitations.
Some of it bothers me as one old gal who croaked here, had like a dozen kids, had one line in, "The old gal died and they already had a graveside service".
Could have at least lied and said she made good cookies.
I realize that some people just go ape shit nuts in the obits, as we all know that person was not that wonderful as they said, and no one cares she tooted a trumpet or collected Norwegian things, as I know God does not give points for things like that. But still it goes on and will probably get worse as people do not have the chance to absorb attention at a funeral and will need to put things into writing.
It is like our old neighbor gave it up before Corona, and there was stuff in it about his love story with his wife, I mean no one wants to read about love stories with a dead body in the place. But people deal with shit they way they deal with it.
I was just pleased we got the mother planted, between winter blasts as it was a cold bitch the day we buried her. Feel bad for people who have to stick them in the cooler and then go through the work of burying them months later. Too many people are burning the body now, and planning for an August party to remember, well all that does is set grief into the future and you hang around in limbo with probably the guys ashes in the closet, which of course get knocked over and have to be Hoovered up, and that sort of takes the charm out of things, knowing the urn had cat fur balls and mouse turds in with the ashes. In China they about have the complete skeleton as they do not waste money on getting the hard stuff like bone and metal ashen.
That reminds me of the Chinese gal who was bitching about the ashes had men things in them for her mother. I mean who but a Chinaman dumps out the ashes and snoops through them. What do they think, there is going to be a Cracker Jack prize inside?
Anyway that is what Coofer Funerals have become, the Lame Cherry version of getting things done and moving on. I see the peony we planted on the grave was up, but I still have to go back and see if Beloved Uncle's is up as it was not. Am thinking about asking my cousin who was good to us, if they would care if we got a peony for their dad's grave to even things out in the good things department.
Will see on that, as the big thing here is planting trees. For 7000 dollars I got an Emerald Maple. Is a nice tree, about 10 foot tall. Probably provide some shade to sit under on the place in 5 years, as maples grow fast, but not at the start in transplanting them. Just sort of tall sticks with not much shade going on.
Well anyway, that is another way the Lame Cherry has changed society. I started it by God's Grace and Coronavirus put the rubber stamp of toe tag on it, to make it the event of the season. When they talk about the world changing, funerals have changed and I doubt we will be going back to the expensive productions, as funeral food sucks, and no one but the rich can afford the big show, and the rich don't want to catch the coof burying people they only were interested in getting the inheritance from.
God leadeth beside the still waters, but Coronavirus disperseth the crowds.
- Lame Cherry
Once again, another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
Nuff Said
agtG
