Lame Cherry: Miracle Corn

As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.

So this is one of those stories which only happen to me and only I could tell.

So you heard about that Wuhan bioweapon attack on God's People. If not that is why you saw all those dufes running around with masks on and everyone was acting oddball after being vaxed. You probably saw that Fauci character all over the media looking like a weasel that got kicked out of the ferret club.

Say wasn't there some cartoon that had a weasel in it? I think there was and that cartoon creation acts just like Fauci. Not the Go Go Gophers weasel or ferret, as I liked him and the fat beaver who looked like Teddy Roosevelt.

Anyway this is not about weasel looking trolls.

So we took precautions. You know drinking bleach like Donald Trump said to (satire) as no one even jokes about drinking bleach in a a plague, but we did take precautions in latex gloves, hosing the nose and ears, bleaching the groceries and not bringing mail into the house.

That brings us to the story, as I have an old pick up that was not running as the battery was dead, so that made a great place to put mail into that I had to keep like statements or gas masks my Auntie made. Not many people have an Auntie who makes you designer gas masks, but she married into the family, so she brought some know how. The ones who are in the blood line just sort of sat it out as they were not inclined like Jews to make gas masks.

Say you know the holocaust would never have happened if those Jews had some McGiver invention. I bet McGiver could have made a gas mask at the concentration camps out of turds and rags, and made like a neutron bomb out of turds and rags and them Jews would have freed themselves and not had to wait to Obama Hussein to take over the world and bring this death virus to us all.

It is too bad that Jews are not good at making gas masks, but we should celebrate them for knowing how to make money.

Any way, so I got these pair of boots as my boots made in China all have holes in them Not paying 150 dollars for a pair of rubber boots which will have a crack in them in a few months. So I got these boots and wear the ones with holes for wet feet which I really do not like as my wet feet is usually cow shit mud wet or it is like winter cold wet and you can't feel your feet.

So I got these boots cheap and they were put into the pick up for a year to kill off those Wuhan bugs. so I bring them in, and they are sitting in the porch and I got to put them on as it is wet and I don't want wet feet that day. I slide my presidential feet into the boot, as you all know I am President Nominee of the Necrosapiens, and I hit allot of something. I wince and think, "What the hell is all that cat food in that boot?" Strange adventures happen to me as I have all sorts of things in my boots and shoes.

So I pull the presidential foot out and reach in and it is corn. Whole corn. Not corn on the cob, whole corn. Field corn and I ain't in no field.

You just do not dump corn out. I live where you use every kernel and I could use it for chicken feed for feeding the chickens as the corn is interchangeable. It is like the first green food there is, and that is good as it is green, well the stalk, then it turns pretty tan, but the corn tends to be yellow as that was sweeter when the original corns were red and rainbow, white, they were all kinds of colours.

So I look at the corn and it is good. Rats and other vermin have a nasty way of eating the hearts out and you are left with a pile of rat saliva corn with rodent piss on it. Rodents always piss on things. Some humans are rodent like that too.

So I get to thinking, that this is my corn. I know that sounds odd as it is my corn, but my corn is this heirloom stuff which I have been working on for years. I did have some in the pick up for storage from the garden a few years ago, and as near as I can tell I had some American mouse. Not those stinky European mice that piss and shit on things but a clean American rodent as all American rodents are clean.

Just like a Blue Jay and other America birds make caches, this must have been a clean American rodent cache and that little bugger made a half a boot full of trips making their cache. That is allot work as it was easier for me to dump it into a plastic bag. This was the first time a rodent shelled corn for me and I can plant it. The mouse had excellent choice too in every kernel was pristine, no wrinkled up culls as the rodent was going to live high on the hog.

That is not so far fetched as mice have a habit of gnawing on smoked pork products like bacon, ham and even deer and beef sausage. I heard one from my senile brother in law who told me this before he was senile, a story which has on memory of now as he is senile, and he should not have stolen from me in sticking me with the mother's bills after she went tits up, but I digress, but he told me he was working on a place and the farmers were deer hunters, had their deer laid out on the barn floor and the mice were eating the fat off the carcasses. Yes that is not very appetizing, but non culinary part was the farmers gave the pre senile one a sausage sandwich. He and his buddy did not eat it. Tossed them out at the end of the driveway as eating mouse gnawed meat did not appeal to him.
He ate lots of cabbage though. Think that was probably his problem as cabbage eaters always end up in trouble in the end.

So that is my adventure. I put on a boot and an American mouse had shelled corn out for me and stored it in the boot.

See your problem is you do not reside in the Brier Patch wilderness. You live in civilization and do not have mice to shell your corn for you. We have all kinds of things that happen here. Had a big murder event where the perp killed everything, hacked up roll aides, suppositories, people, animals, ruined a good bat, ruined a good knife, pretended he was a Jew in Egypt in putting blood on the door posts and then kidnapped a kid, fed it and did other things you do with a kid, before the kid drove him nuts and he confessed to the cops or no one would have ever caught him.

I do not know the penalty for cutting up suppositories , but I think like tags on beds which are not to be removed, that cutting anal products is a bad crime. It must be as that is what they charged him for as no one much cared about the other things........well except the knife. No one in the brier can stomach someone abusing a knife........or a rope........or a steak. You do that and they will not wait for a trial and hang you from the lamp posts like in France. I though believe in law and order and this is why American rodents adore me and fill my boots with shelled corn for planting. It is like Elijah with that woman in the famine. Yes a Prophetess is special, but I do not think God places special attention to my being President nominee as there is not much God stuff in secular stuff, but here am I an instrument for Him to work through. I do believe though that if the Bible was not so final in and Old and New Testament, that if God had dictated a Pre Jesus, Jesus is here for Jews to crucify Him and Jesus comes back, that my corn story would be in the Jesus comes back. People could come on pilgrimage to look at my corn. Catholics would probably give lots of money as they do that, but I do not share with the Vatican as they have billions they bilked from poor people for centuries. Probably be some Cathedral built and the corn would have a light shining on it as a miracle, it would be an icon, which would probably become a stumbling block as an idol that people would pray to. That does happen, but all the same, that is probably why God ended the Bible in two sections as He knew I would come along and be very popular, sort of between St. Paul and Moses, and all this Lame Cherry stuff would fill up the 3rd Bible more than the first two sections as Jesus was modest in all His miracles could have filled up a planet sized library as Jesus outdistances me as the Son of God by a long shot.

I am glad that I got corn and not wine in my boot as my feet get wet enough. Not much use for wine as you can't plant it, need grapes for that and I would rather get my grapes out of concentrate, no I take that back as we have been eating lots of Chernobyl grapes in this plague. They are nice in they glow at night and you don't need to turn on the lights.

Well that is about it for my adventure as it is cold here and I need to go rest to tend the fire later to keep us warm

Miracle Corn, who would have thunk it that God is still doing miracles for those who work for Him.