your wheat seems to be suffering from syphilis and your land is depleted in gold dust
this is going to cost allot to fix this.
As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
I have always realized that rich farmers are dumb fucks. I knew they were stupid as farmers are like a bleating flock of sheep in you get one Judas Goat to do something and they whole damned bunch will almost kill themselves to do the same thing.
I swear that you can tell a farmer something that makes sense, and they will argue with you like you are insane as no one else is doing it............and in a few years one of my ideas is tried by another farmer and then all these dumb fucks are doing the same thing and it is genius.
That is why I shake my head and kick myself as while I did not invent the cell phone which is the ultimate appendage to farmers as they can't stay off the damned things. My old man was before cell phones, and I'm surprised farmers survived without them. His crutch was having coffee with a bunch of other losers where they came up with asinine ideas. Here is typical farmer idea.
So the old man had me as his nigger doing all the work. He had it in this head that a big round baler had to be run by our 450 Farmall. That 560 we had was too big. It would destroy everything. How he knew I have no clue as he never baled hay.
So I got tired of that fucking 450 as it was underpowered. Literally you would drive up a hill baling, wide open, and barely make it as the baler was barely turning. You had to run that fucking tractor wide open all the time.
So I had enough of that shit. My brother had left and that left me in charge. So I put the 560 on the baler and I soon had it in 4th gear and was idled down to low throttle. The baler barely turned, as tractor was running low RPM, but it was baling perfectly in gear speed.
The old man sees me baling and he is pissing and moaning, carrying on like he did with my brother, about that big tractor on the baler. I listened and after awhile in protest I said, "Dad, with that 450 I have to run it wide open and I'm wearing the baler out. With the 560, I throttle down and save the baler".
It was like Star Trek phaser stun hit him. No more words and all was quiet.
Two weeks later over supper, he says to me, "You know I'm glad I put that 560 on that baler as you can run it slower and you don't wear the baler out".
That is the big farmer. The guy who puts in our crop, can not get it through his head to swing wide and not knock posts off in the driveway when turning in. He also could never get a Vermeer baler to start a baler in hay without swinging out into another field for junk to start a bale. I get knowledge from him in what I should be doing often enough or what is wrong, as if I do not know a calf is dead.
I digress.
So the reason I kick myself is a bout a decade ago this creature appeared, the agronomist. I thought what a fucking fruit that was and job. A guy from Iowa moved here and was driving his ATV around in fields and I liked the guy, but it was like, what the hell is this bullshit about?
An agronomist tells a farmer how to farm. They look for weeds, bugs, ph, fertilizer tests, and other things that busy farmers are too busy to do as they are not farming, as they are talking on their cell phones.
See a cell phone is the friend a farmer never had. It allows them to have contact as most of their wives are such bitches bitching about shit because these farmers are all lazy asses. Now this is where the agronimist comes in. An agronomist is a phone with legs.
An agronomisst is like AI without the answers, except for a farmer to spend more money. Farmers will spend money in this transaction, like for a prostitute to get some attention from another human.
I never realized how needy rich farmers are. I kick myself that all I need to do was fake it at an ag college as they are all tard professors there that people shunned in school, so pretending to be interested in an ag profess for a few hours would have paved my way to a new 4 wheel drive pickup an ATV and piles of money. Hell the rich neighbor next place who is a real asshole has two agronomists as he really needs a friend being an asshole. The last one had a dumb ass sheltie dog. I mean those collies, heelers and shephers suck shit as dogs. Always hyper, always darting around wanting to chase cattle and none of these assholes even owns a sheep. For me, I would just ride around in a field, set traps to pick up bounty, then tell all the farmers the same thing, as I got kickbacks from the contractors for all the spraying and shit I was offering. I would have a decent hunting dog too and find a way to do most of my work while fishing or in the fall, I would be hunting all these farmer's lands. Probably borrow their equipment too, to farm my own land, but of course I would not be an asshole farmer, I would be the agronomist who was the all knowing wetware AI.
Nuff Said
agtG
The Edgar Winter Group - Free Ride (Audio) - YouTube
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