I think of things............
I think of good people who do not know how good they are for being good to someone as lowly as myself. For taking interest in Libby and Darby, and wondering if they were the two ponies TL and I were trying to rescue earlier, but it appears that God has some other plan I can not understand.
I think of fathers, and how I decided a very long time ago to heed Christ's advice and have just the One in Heaven as most earthly parents never measure up to Ward Cleaver and we never measure up to Beaver.
My dad never told me he loved me once in his life. I do not remember a hug, but I do remember getting a great deal of hell. I believe that good people just play the worst hand dealt them and that we play better as the years progress as we are no longer the children of our fathers eyes, who in their castigation never saw the lumber yard in their own eyes of how they failed to be parents in getting through to a child.
I once counseled a happy pill fed wife of a Baptist preacher to get a divorce which did not go well with the preacher, as he had that hardness of your heart going on in him of chained together for life or torment. The Old Testament was a matter of saying you were divorced and then never going back to the woman as it was finished.
Jesus did this, in after God divorced Israel and Judah, He never went back, as Jesus had to die to take his Wife back, who are all of us repentant sinners. Sometimes people in life cut and run too quick as this Obama American group is, and sometimes people just stick it out too long as my Mom did.
Odd as I have said, and I am grateful, that my Mom prayed "How long Lord, I just can not take it any more", about my dad, and within the hour he was dead from a silent heart attack.
That was one of the best prayers Mom ever was moved to speak.
Our Sundae is right in I have it all in TL with all the drama involved too. I did not sign up for drama, but God knows best and I enjoy every moment with TL.
I always tell TL that we do have 95% of everything and it is that 5% which is the problem. Readers will know that 5% as a money situation, in what I am asking for that money for is a place to live with TL.
The astute might have figured out that when I am marooned, it might be because I have run the gauntlet to be with TL as we live a great distant apart. Winter is hell for such stuff, and Mom has to deal with the animals with our neighbor's help while I am away.
I forget really how many times I have almost been killed in coming here due to people's wills getting satan unbound to try and murder me. That RV trying to run me off the road was not appreciated.
TL and I did have Thanksgiving together and I was most grateful even if we were both quite sick. As Sundae defined it completely, I do have it all with TL no matter what.
After my a hole cousins renigged on selling my Grandfather's place to us as a work of satan, I am sure of, we have been trying to find something within distance of Mom's place. I am working on overcoming satan in Christ, in we have two properties left if I can get through to the people, as both are owned by inheritors and as of today we have tracked down a new set of phone numbers, after calls to the Register of Deeds Office.
I would that it was easy. I would that in some way God would move some rich person to donate a half a million dollars, so I could just rest from all of this for a bit, before putting both oars in the water. satan though has a big hold on rich people, and it has been tough in all of this, but all I can do is keep moving by the flank and believe a breakthrough will come.
It took too long for TL to appear, but when TL did, that was something easy. I figure that I keep hitting that wall, Jericho will tumble, as there is no alternative.
The one property has some dink house on it I think that looks more like a granary. The other has this big old house with a hole in the roof. They both have grass pastures though and that is what moves my heart as there is something peaceful about pastures to me.
I am really tired right now and TL is asleep. I wonder how much in life used to matter to me and now I could care less of those things like watching sports.
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