As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
Many times our entertainment involves those 10 movies you always see for sale in Walmart for 5 dollars, but I get them at the thrift store for 2 dollars. This pack of bad movies had one named Best of the Best Part IV. I have no idea how good the first one was, but I know that the first one sucked the blood out of this version as it sucked.
Best of the Best 4: Without Warning (Video 1998) - IMDb
Directed by Phillip Rhee. With Phillip Rhee, Ernie Hudson, Tobin Bell, Thure Riefenstein. A group of Russian mobsters have stolen a huge supply of paper for printing ...
The best I can figure out in this Harvey Weinstein movie, which released directly to video is that Harvey Weinstein was balling someone as this movie is just queer.
First you got guys on pink faggot motorcyles as robbers who steal a truck for 100 dollar Ben Franklin bills for Russians who look like Germans.
Then you got this hot chic named Jessica Collins whose main features appear cleavage and cock sucking lips, as her scenes were she smiles, she lays by the pool, she drives a car and she points a gun. She is good at acting pretty because you do not notice how bad the scenes are.
Ernie Hudson from Ghost Busters appears, as a fat old uninteresting cop, and he excels.
There is some kung fu guy in this..........really boring as he is the star.
Then there is the rest of the movie in ludicrous stunts, fight scenes and just things that sound good on paper but really are goofy on film, like the Kung Fu slides his motorcycle under a tanker and the best one where Kung Fu pops a wheelie on the bike and deflects being shot at.
Now for what is the best of the film.
Thure Riefenstein, he plays Andrew Breivik the guy who shot all those liberals in Sweden or Norway. Dude is interesting until he gets tired beating up a guy hanging from the ceiling.
What saves the movie is Eric Clapton or Tobin Bell. He is really a great henchman. He is close to Allan Rickman in Die Hard. Man has great presence and is what carried this movie.
I could not help though to think how great this movie would have been if Joaquin Phoenix was starring with Jan Michael Vincent. Yes Joaquin could play the Kung Fu Asian, and JMV would of course play the black guy, then the movie would have rocked.
See dude looks just like Eric Clapton.
See the movie ends with Kung Fu stealing a fire truck, running the ladder to the heavens as the Russians take off in a plane, and he throws a satchel charge into the landing gear and it blows up. Now that is just ridiculous, and you can see why Harvey Weinstein left that go as he had a face full of pussy distracting him. Now the Lame Cherry would have written it this way.
As Jan Michael Vincent was busy beating to death Russian Ninja's by the thousands with his metal gimp leg, Joaquin Phoenix would have jumped into the fire truck, raised the ladder, jumped out of the driver seat, kept it in gear, climbed up the ladder and as the plane flew by, Joaquin would have jumped to the plane, pistol blazing, smashing co cockpit glass, where Joaquin would have jumped through, skulled Andrew Breivik, and then fought it out with Eric Clapton as the plane crashed into the Playboy Mansion pool, where having killed Eric Clapton, Joquin would have rescued 500 Playboy Playmates.
Now that is the kind of wholesome movie that one could take the children too which would have been a classic.
I think that is about it. I would really like to remake this movie with Harvey Weinstein though, starring JP and JMV and shot my way in the stunts. I would even cast that nasy Ashley Judd........hell stick G size tits into her, inject an assload of botox and put a ton of Max Factor on her, and I could get another film out of her in Best of the Best Part XXX.
Yes that was about it and of course I am always open to Harvey Weinstein donations or writing and directing his next come back extravaganza.
You know if Harvey Weinstein had any brains, he would secretly bankroll a film, and get all his accusers to sign unbreakable contracts, and then make them do things in the movie to ruin their already ended careers for a classic for the ages.
agtG
