As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
I type this on Sunday, and I had deluded myself into believing that all of the major emotional surprises would be over in bills and whatever, but then TL and I started doing the thank you cards to people who had sent cards this past week, and I wanted to make a phone call too, to a cousin who had purchased a pretty rose wreath for the casket as we could not afford one.
I fully intended to inform my cousin as to what shits my sisters were in not helping to pay that 7000 dollars for the funeral, and then she dropped a bomb on me in stating that both of my sisters had contacted her already, one by card and the other by phone thanking her for that wreath.
My jaw hit the floor, as those two have not said a word to us or my brother, but are so Goddamned concerned about their reputations that they are doing end runs around me, in contacting people to make themselves look involved or like they are doing something.
No matter that this makes me look incompetent like I could not be trusted to do thank you notes, or what they hoped people would conclude that I had asked them to help out, as we are all one big happy family, as this is about them again, the two worthless asses who would do thing with mom or for mom for over a decade, but now they do not want to have people knowing what absolute mother haters they were.
This was all about money. If mom had money, they would have been all over her, but as she was poor, they were not going to be stuck with bills or be bothered with her and that hurt mom greatly. It just absolutely stuns me the audacity of these two in pulling this.
Audacity comes though from psychosis in these cases, and in forensic psychology, I can make a series of deductions.
First as both of them are contacting people, it means they are not talking or coordinating, as the one sent a card, and she is too cheap with her asshole husband to spend 50 cents, unless there is something in it for them. These were the two who tried to con gas money out of me when I had none after mom broke her hip, but sister did come rushing out for my last 20 bucks to pay for her share of some pharms we had to pick up.
Second, both only appeared at the funeral not out of love, but for not wanting people to know what shit they are. The Holy Ghost pointed out as I was observing them that the oldest lemming looked lost. She made no contact with me, while the other tried to act concerned in her delusions in trying to pump me for information, so she had something to say to people when they asked, as if she was in the loop.
For them to react this way, as I suspected something was going on as we had not been hearing from people, that they were the ones getting the cards, and as I told my brother as I was fuming, I wonder how much beer that is going to buy for the brother in law, as we all know mom would have wanted it that way..
Third, for them to that kind of chance in acting like they had taken over, and I would not find out about it and let people know, is an act of desperation. That guilt they are trying to cover up in "doing this for mom", which is all about them again, is something they will never get over, and at this point, I fully intend to plead to God that they have no peace in this ever, and it would please me if it put them both into early graves.
TL and I suffered greatly. Our lives were put on hold. Mom was not pleasant and she tried to break us up. Yet we did what was right as those two daughters would have killed her off long ago and divided the spoils. That is what makes me furious in this in we are the ones who were cooking, cleaning, showering and treating mom to keep her alive as they were phoning it in. This was not the first time I did this for mom, as I literally saved her life four times in mending her, and I was the only one who did that.
So for these two miscreant daughters to now swoop in and pull this behind my back is the end of all of this. This is the last betrayal in a host of betrayals and what I simply did not need in more being upset in how I have been sick and degrading these past weeks. They could not help one day when mom was alive, and mm did not want them around at all at the funeral, but I was being stupidly kind again in informing them, and for that with the thousands of dollars of debt I keep discovering plus the funeral, those two have their new homes, but are investing a phone call and a few stamps as they lie to people about ever caring about mom.
I informed the cousin of the reality and did so, as I know that will spread from them and people will know. I know my cousin did not want to get involved and just said it is hard with families, everyone knew that those two were never around for mom, but now they are the glorious daughters.
They, their children and their spouses were all guilty, Only one of them asked about Gram as the others knew what would have happened if they set me off. It just is dirty laundry which I am ashamed of being aired in public, but it is just one thing after another in things slapping me across the face each day in things I never expected.
It is a horrid thing to think things were over and then to have this set things off again. I do not know how long it has been in all I wanted was some peace, and each day it is some new mountain falling on us. This nailed me as this is something I never would have stooped to. That has always been my problem in I have the weakness of duty and honor, which is what most of the population is not blinded by.
Nuff Said
agtG
