As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
I thought the Viking would appreciate this survival tip from the Corona Apocalypse.
Back in the metro days, TL had purchased at Toys R Us a nice aluminum child's bat, which was carried in the car as firearm ownership was frowned upon, and you simply needed something to even things up a bit.
In the brier patch, I usually have something behind the pick up seat as numbers of the people here do. My current tool is a bolt action 20 gauge shotgun, from before the time when serial numbers were necessary, and I was pleased the thing actually fired when I blew a skunk away.
It has a clip for 2 shots, and it sort of falls out as all these models do, but it is more for just waving in the air in the event a meltdown comes. Still waiting to purchase our handguns.
In lieu of that, I did get two children's bats, a wooden one and an aluminum one, which I have have been batting vermin over the head with. The aluminum one is quite perfect for range and I do quite well in batting skulls.
All said and done though, they are a bit long, and while I do have a Marlin bat, which is used to kill fish by batting them over he head in ocean fishing. that hangs by the door as it is a bit short.
Today though in the thrift, I was walking by the kid's section which I never look at as only grubby Mexicans are usually wiping boogers on things, I saw this 2 foot long little Minnesota Twins sovenier bat. Have no idea what reprobate when to Minnesota, and if the pink is for women's things, or what, but I nabbed the bat as that is what I wanted.
Thing is there was no price on it, as it was quarter sale day. I will not ask the women in the store for prices on things, ,as they always gouge, so I wanted back and found a sticker on the floor as they always have stickers there, and as it was 60 cents, I stuck it on, and thought it was 10 cents too much. Alternative was the 80 cent sticker lying there, so it sort of evened out as a whisk was there without a price, and we got that for a quarter as the gal likes us at the counter.
I think I will drill a hole in the pink thumper, but a leather thong through it for wrist wrapping and keep it in the pick up as preparation for the Coronavirus Apocalypse. As there is a Zombie Apocalypse, I figure Corona zombie will appear too, as the virus was found in the spine of one person looking like encephalitis.
I tried it out on a naughty baby calf in the porch who was trying to eat plastic, and just a tap changed her mind, so I figure a tap will change the mind of any zombie too.
I do have concerns as this is China made, looks like American ash they stole from America, and milled with slave labor, but I wonder in the excitement of fighting against zombie if I might break the thing. My brother was an ass and broke a pretty little bat I had by winding up and wailing on a ball. No sense in an 18 year old kid. So I know they will break, but I am of the notion that using it as a billy club behind the ear, even if it breaks, I will have at least one zombie down, and I can start ranting about shoving that pike up any remaining zombie ass, and I figure zombie have had a rough time of it, and will know that a pike up the ass is not something a zombie wants.
I figure all you rich people can afford a Toys R Us bat as you wait to donate here, but for people like me fighting for survival, we have to find our defense where it comes. As TL said, that pink bat will not look lethal to the cops. I suppose if I drilled a hole in it, threaded a half inch rod down it, that it would not appear lethal either if I plugged the end with a wood plug.
So that is the pink thumper. I hope you poor people might happen upon one too. After all, they probably gave away 50,000 of the damn things, and half of them went as some "Oh that will be a collector's item", and the rest the kids beat the hell out of or broke hitting each other over the head.
There should be about 20,000 of them and I would imagine other loser teams have bat days too, so you probably will have your own vagina bat in your town too as sports got it into their heads that doing vagina things will make women want to watch a boring game. If that worked so well, men would have dyed their dicks pink long ago and had women having sex with them non stop as a pink penis would mean "I am sensitive to your vagina thoughts and I care".
Anyway after that satirical reality, that is my pink thumper and I will think of the Viking as I battle the zombie of the Coronavirus Apocalypse.
Once again, another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
Nuff Said
agtG
