This is the story of Little Jam Tarts or as he is known in South Dakota, Scott Heidepriem. (Yeah I don't get that name either as the front end it is German in vowels and at the back end it is Anglo.)
That sounds kind of sexually deviant doesn't it, but it was not written out that way as that is what the name is.
Ok enough digressing, this is a post election lesson as this blog being so internationally spied upon, stolen from and read, I have to be careful in my entourage in what posts here as a mere mention of Scott Heidepriem looking like the mad scientist with hair like he sticks his fingers in electric sockets made Scotty comb his hair and be respectable.......we could not have that though.
The lesson in this how not to run an election.........sort of the way all Democrats sunk to in the election..........well all the Democrats.
As you can see about Scotty's banner banner, that he likes his family to make up for his being bald with big hair.
Dick Morris rule number #102, if you look like you create monsters out of body parts in a dungeon, do not make it worse by having all your family look like Farah Faucet from the 1970's.
First, it looks even more odd in bald comparisons, and second, it makes your sons look gay.
Dick Morris rule number #408, do not make your boys look gay in South Dakota as there are only about 200 sodomites in the buffalo chip state, and child molesters do not get to vote in South Dakota like they do in Minnesota for Al Franken.
So the Dick Morris rule #32 is, cut the boys hair to make them look all American like Governor Mike Rounds, and tame the old lady's hair down to look like Kristi Noem.
The next important Dick Morris rule is, the rule when you look like a mad scientist, in rule #87, that in running campaign ads, you do not put on old geezer Democrats no one remembers saying how great you are, or traitor RHINO's like Scott Heidepriem is.
Yes Scott Heidepriem was the Arlen Specter of South Dakota in he left the GOP for Obamania, and could not crawl up the halo head's ass far enough for stimulus money, putting South Dakota into debt.
#87 reads, if you are going to be a traitor, don't put a bunch of other traitors on television saying how great you are.
Misery loves company but voters hate gaggles of traitors in their midst.
Scotty also refused to blow his load. Yes in Dick Morris rules this is rule #3 as it is so important. In politics, it is not like sex. See you got to get on the voter early and shoot your wad early in campaign ads in defining your opponent and defining you. It does not work to wait until the end in saving your money, because by then your opponent who does not look like a mad scientist has already beat your ass.
Rule #3 was violated by Heidepriem, along with rule #2, which is the Dick Morris and Bill Clinton rule of "Don't think you are Moses coming down from the Mount as America is not going to listen to you".
Yeah Scottie shot his load way late after the wife was basking in the glow of the Republican victor. Scottie decided that a half hour commercial of his mad science was what South Dakotan's wanted............no they turned over and watched Vanna White.
The worse of this, as worst is coming in this "how to be a campaign manager lesson" is Heidepriem aired his final scary message on Halloween which was bizarre.
Heidepriem literally must have Hitler in his blood as this egomaniac does not listen to his wife or his campaign staff.
The scene is the mad scientist sitting in his dictator chair in Wolf Lair or some odd national socialist enclave in Sodom Dakota.
Scotty for Obama reasons was reading a teleprompter which was off to his side so he had his head cocked to the side.
Dick Morris rule #8, when you talk to people, look straight at them or they conclude you are a crook.
Scotty then violated Dick Morris rule # 18, which is when you change camera angle, you do not have the camera on top of your head, so your beady little eyes glare up at people making you look like a backstabbing, malevolent little psychopath who escaped your lab.
This brings us to Dick Morris rule #1 which Scott Heidepriem violated and that is when you look like a wacko Obama voter, and your wife looks like a Playboy Centerfold, you make her the pixie of your campaign, even in some blog has been exposing Stephanie Herseth Sandlin as a boobless wonder with an inflatable bra.
Yes I was stunned in the digital I received as I reclined as watching the Hunchback of Heidepriem in his lair, all of a sudden walked out this gorgeous, petite, strawberry blonde wife with real D size breasts.
For an entire year Scott Heidepriem had scared voters and bored voters when he could have been enticing voters with his wife, in making them think, "What the hell Maxwell! If Scotty can get that into bed sober, maybe he isn't so frankenstein and I might vote for his wife's hair and breasts as she looks like Mary McKenzie from KSFY with like pointy breast and red hair."
This is the worst sin of election mismanagement in not using the wife to the full extent, and violating rule #13, the Hillary Clinton rule by Dick Morris in making a hot blonde look like an old hag.
Goodness Scotty, you got a hot chic wife milf and you put a black and white photo from Farah days, and yuckers their is white bread insane looking you, looking whiter than paint, and making everyone ask again, "What is this woman doing with this mad scientist!"
When you have a hot wife, you don't hide her and you certainly don't make her head look bigger than George Washington on Mount Rushmore.
Yes this Little Tart Jams, aka Susan Heidepriem was the Dick Morris factor who could have won Scotty the election............if Scotty and baby butchering Democrats had any brains they would have just run, run around Sue, and she could have violated all the rules and been the Governor of South Dakota and nobody would have cared how much her Democratic lawyer husband had already screwed up South Dakota.
Scott Heidepriem has a wife with looks, a body like that and legs to Tennessee and there he sits like a lounge lizard with his shirt open, exuding greasiness and two gay looking sons who can't tuck their shirts in.
Dick Morris rule #45, tuck your shirts in like Mom and stop looking like future Barney Frank interns.
I honestly have never met a woman who did not think she could improve a man. They are always picking on them and fussing with them. That is what makes no sense in Susan Heidepriem as common woman sense should have had her fussing with this group of 3 mansexuals and turning them into men who did not freak out the voters.
Common sense which is Dick Morris rule #7 says in a Republican state you do not betray the GOP, you do not run ads hammering the GOP in the primaries as you need them later and you do not put a Republican from Wall, South Dakota on the ticket as why would South Dakotans vote for a traitorous Scotty and a RHINO sell out when you can vote for the real thing.
Democrats look at this and think, "What the sh*t dimwit, there are nothing but Republicans on the ticket........I'm not voting for any of them."
Scott Heidepriem violated the Dick Morris rule #39 which is the flat world rule in just because you think Sioux Falls is the big vote block and you live there, you do not pick Elmer from Wall who can only bring in 132 votes from his little town.
All of this gains Scott Heidepriem the title of running thee worst campaign in America since Obama had the White House handed to him.
Apparently Heidepriem thought bragging his wife up in being 3rd generation South Dakotan was going to gain him the Obama throne........problem is in South Dakota that is new settler status as most of the settlers arrived in 1880 with the Indian wars still fresh, and the Heidepriem wife being only 3rd is a far cry from the 4th and 5th generation residents in a state that tells of family.
No Dick Morris rule there, but is one he didn't think he had to make up as you have to be American to be in the White House as that is in the Constitution.
All of this is bothersome as Little Jam Tarts would have made viewing South Dakota more interesting...........guess I will have to content myself with the mind of Kristi Noem.
PS: Oh and Little Jam Tarts comes from a Create cooking show I had on with that hot blonde Irish chef who always has her cleavage on show and is always showing off her butt in jeans. She was cooking little jam tarts, and in Charles Dickens love of names..........I was Inspired that this was the most lovely of names for this post.
Little Jam Tarts married to crusty oatmeal. Love is blind and apparently has not taste buds either.
What is the definition of an Independent Democrat?
A lunatic escaped from the assylum.
Dick Morris rules.
agtG
