Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Ambrosia in Paradise


As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.

For all the crappy people who are tools of satan in sending notes, there are numbers of good people, and the other day a Citizen of Canada wrote a note thanking me for writing of apple seedlings and Christians. This pleased me because I love Western Canada.....well I like eastern Canada too and my great grandparents sojourned in Nova Scotia for awhile after 1776, before rejoining America, but western Canada is just wonderful country.

The writer is from British Columbia and that is simply the Eden of the Rockies. On the coast is zone 5 and in the interior are mountains which humans have probably yet to touch. The Columbia is born from the region and she is living creature in the swells as she speaks in tones that make humans know how little they are.

This though is about apples and if I lived in Vancouver...well I would not as I am not of the city, but if I lived in zone 5 British Columbia, I would plant Ambrosia apples, which are Canadian.
I recall that they found an apple in a Red Delicious orchard, and it was this Ambrosia, and it is a wonderfully ...........you know how apple jacks taste....well Ambrosia is alike Fruit Loops compared to apple jacks.
It is really unique and a very nice apple, and I have several in the fridge trying to sprout from seed, but do not know about the cold where I reside in the brier patch, but it is always a good adventure.

Honestly when it comes to apples, we ate apples off of a relative's of ours tree, a Haralson in apple crisp 3 years ago, and it was so wonderful and we ate non stop, that I still am not hankering for apple crisp. That was after we ate apples, kept apples, and I think we picked up two barrels of windfalls for the goats. An apple tree in semi dwarf or standard will deluge you with apples.
Last year Baby Belle and Daisy did me the world of favors in picking all the apples off the ground from our trees, as that is a messy chore and if you do not pick them up, worms become a problem.

So a few Ambrosias would be just the thing, and Ranier cherries....oh how wonderful that would be too. The area there is just fruit heaven from berries to apples and pears. Must not be so good for peaches though as one never hears of BC peaches.

For me though, I just do not like that damp cold. I thrive in Arctic cold as that is dry cold, but get me into that foggy, damp Scotland, Nova Scotia, Norway and BC damp, and you might as well turn off the light. Nothing is fun when you are wet. Is like Washington when my neighbor moved out there he said, "Hell you don't stop for rain out here as you would never get anything done as it rains all the time."
Am no fan of woolen sweaters either in summer. Those Norwegians I see all paled out in July just makes me wonder why humans torture themselves like that. Now the pampas in Argentina, that will get you there and back.

Never have Argentinian fruit either. Chile grows great fruit.

What do you think this is a geographical fruit lesson eh?

I like Canadians even if I ride their asses about lynching Louis Riel and being impounded by Ottawa, as Canadians just are good people.  I would appreciate it if they were a bit more in blood lust for their own good, but then Americans are ruled by pansies so what does that say about lynch meetings at dusk and Church at dawn.

It is nice to talk about apples and think of places on earth that are not cesspools of humanity or a weather that is trying to kill everything each time the wind changes.

I was just thinking when I used to listen to CJOB out of Winnipeg, there was a traffic gal on there who had the most diverse accent I have ever heard. I can make Canadians think I am native, but that gal she honest to God had a speech pattern that sounded like she talked in reverse. I never could mimic the way she spoke. It was that rural Manitoba type that is so Canadian English in how sweet it sounds in being a soft dialect.

It is always nice to talk about apples and dream of apple things, as apple trees talk a great deal. They are not standoffish like pears, but not as familiar as cherries......peaches are like cats in look and do not touch. Apples are just happy trees in how they sing. If you talk to them, they listen and understand and are always pleased to have the attention.

Now I have told you too many secrets again in knowing how to speak apple language.

Canadians are very clever in getting you to tell them things, like I want a Winchester 71 in 248 Winchester, to pretend I am out doing things like hunting moose, where a trade gun would suffice as good as anything, except for big foot hunting from what I was told.

Anyway, Ambrosia is a very nice apple.

Canadians should appeal to real America to invade to rescue them from that communist Trudeau. Kind of hard in Ivanka Trump acting comrade now, but I think the apples would be worth the invasion and the Alberta beef.

Nuff Said