Monday, May 29, 2017

Congratulations to the Baby Girl

As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.

I must be dinosaur ancient now in I had not idea they had driver's education simulators for people learning to drive. What a great loss it is to not have other people laughing at you in a driver's education car with the teacher who looked like their occupation was National Guard potato peeler when they were not teaching art class to retards during the summer.

My first driving experience was when I was 8. My dad's Cousin, Red, yes red hair, allowed me to drive his old Chevy pick up and I was stunned and astounded as they rode along. Red was always kind to me and I think it was the first time I saw my dad in a different way of someone I could get along with.

Things did not progress better as what I  was driving was an  International Scout with so much play in the steering wheel that Mom's knuckles were white as she hung on. My knuckles were white as my brother ordered me to drive home from Indian country at the speed limit, as the car had worn out front shocks and floated like a butterfly on every bump.

I think if I started on a simulator I still would be on it. It was like in my driving test, I sat on the intersection waiting for like 5 minutes, to where the examiner said, "It was not a bad thing, but it might have caused an accident".

I passed my test though and it cowgirl driving ever since.........well until I met TL.

When I met TL I drove to the metro, like your metro and almost had a heart attack literally, as I was numb when I parked and felt like  phaser stunned from Star Trek. You will get it figured out as you are used to it with your Dad, but I was talking to someone after my experience who was in the Twin Cities and was country and they said something like, 'My God the people there drive like maniacs!!!  We just prayed and drove".
Of course Minneapolis is not like Chicago or LA, but it is something you have to pay attention to and always drive for the other person, which means always try to keep an open space between you and traffic in case you or the other person makes a mistake.

God keep you safe Baby Girl, and I hope you one day have the fun of driving back roads in some pick up or chasing cattle in a like vehicle for some wheel spinning work as there is an art form and a skill to drive in the country, as much as the city.
Oh the lecture too, do not ever underestimate loose  gravel on country roads and going too fast. That stuff is as bad  as snow.

I am very proud of you and welcome to the driving world. I remember when you were young, and now you are making me dinosaur, but that is a good thing as popular girls should be replaced by the pretty girls who are pretty inside and out.

With that, I have to put some kind of Minnesota Lutheran type casserole in the oven that is hamburger, noodle and red all over, but we are not having Lutheran jello as  it is not a funeral food group tonight.......instead it is rhubarb cake, another Minnesota staple like breathing and fishing.

PS: I would have fished crappies too. I think those carp rivers in Iowa would kill anything that looked trout. Believe that water is hot when it comes  out of the ground and cooks the fish.

That above was my dream car which I still look on Ebay for and just frown. It was a Carrol Shelby (race car driver) Mustang Cobra. I wanted a 429 interceptor in it, if it would fit and a 4 barrels Holley carburetor, 4 on the floor stick shift.
There is nothing more lovely than to be in car with a carburetor, slamming the pedal to the floor and feel that lull, before the second set of jets open in the carb, and the engine makes that growling sound that only a Holley can make it sound.

My brother was in a town west of you with is 66 Mustang and the interstate was 1 lane, and he noticed an old green Roadrunner (Plymouth hot car) was approaching the line of traffic on the passing lane, and he wondered what the driver would do. He said, next thing he knew the car belched some smoke and it was  gone like a rocket and made it past the single lane traffic and that was the last he saw of it.

Of course you have to drive careful or your Dad and  Mum will skin me alive. Get a good heavy car though, none of that light fast skidder stuff, as the heavy cars will hold better and keep you safer. When you get dinosaur you might get a La Sabre like me. Zelda  never let me down. She has no pick up, but Lord God that car will pass anything and everything in sight. She looks like a highway patrol car so I scare the heck out of the other drivers, except the highway patrol who caught me in Iowa several  years ago from behind.

Always one day for the Shelby, got to have dreams.

Nuff Said