As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
In this isolation of dealing with the death of mom, there has been a bright spot in it has allowed people to comfort us with like stories of caring for those they love, in letting us know that we are all in this together. I try to mention people who tell their stories to recognize them or utilize them as shining examples of what is right with America in others who do not appear here. In that, I woke up thinking this morning about the Viking and about the wonderful Christian example his wife, Rany, shows to her Mom and to her Mother in Law, who are both in need of elderly supervision and care, and are both at home yet, and how she divides her time between them. Because Rany gave her Mother in Law her word, and with her, her word is gold.
I want to brag on her for the Viking's sake in the things he has mentioned in passing of his appreciation for his wife, and for her as an example of so many people in this world who do the right thing. This is what holds America together by the frayed threads an they deserve credit, because they are not ever going to be given Presidential Medals or appear in the newspaper, for they are the Quiet Virtue which holds America together.
From what I have discerned, Rany is most special in her story is the thing of movies, in she is a survivor of the Khmer Rouge, the communists of Cambodia. Three million of Cambodians were murdered in that purge, and somehow in that by God's Grace, Rany and her family survived to immigrate to America, and bring so much to this country. Not enough is ever extolled about the Indochinese Peoples. They are family oriented, honest, brave and can be relied upon. I know these different nationalities well and I pay special attention to them.
The shining example of Rany and the Viking is their daughter, Baby Girl. Baby Girl has the most motherly of moms. Indochinese mother pay great attention to their children in guiding them. There is a real connection and bond between mother and child, and that is why Rany cares for her Mom and Mother in Law, as that is just what is done.
The Viking shared Baby Girl's report card with me. She is a remarkable young lady in straight A's. She is moral and on a good path to the future, because of the relationship she has with her mother. Baby Girl also helps out with the care of both of her grandparents. You are never going to have to worry about Baby Girl ever being a problem in society. She is solid and strong, as she is bright and beautiful. Yes she is pretty like her mother, and in all of that you would never know as there is not a conceited bone in her body.
I hear often enough when the Viking sends a note to keep me aware that good people are in this world, that Baby Girl is somewhere in the house singing, and how much adores to hear her voice.
If Baby Girl was Filipino, she would be defined in that culture as the Golden Child.
I am certain that Rany is a private person as TL and I are. She though is a wonderful lady who the Viking tells me often that she is the best wife anyone could have. The Viking is like all men in having a good heart and not ever knowing quite how to express things correctly, so he needs the women in his life's help, and from all he has mentioned over the years, he has the two best in the mother and daughter in his life.
I desire all of you to think about a daughter and daughter in law, who is up daily driving, checking, caring and helping with her Mom and her Mom in Law. The Viking has said how Mom Viking is a woman that wants things her way, like mom wanted things here, but Rany is a person who knows how to communicate with Mom Viking and Rany can persuade her to do things for the best, when not even her own children can prevail.
I was listening to my cousin, who has bone cancer now and wondering about his treatment if he will continue, in his telling us about the Filipino nurses who cared for Auntie when she broke her hip. How they work at one hospice, are off to another, and if they think about leaving for another job, the phone is ringing trying to hire them. The people of south Asia are all gems in the Christian virtue they bring to American culture. The women seem passive, but they are nothing of the sort. They are strong, intelligent, gifted in dealing with people, and you can count on them to always do any job right.That is Rany, who is more Christian than Christians, just by who she is.
I think in our situation in learning about how many people go through elderly family care, as they are responsible and will not abandon their family, and the efforts this woman has made. She came to America, has learned the language, is involved in the culture, celebrates Cambodian holidays, and enriches her child with this incredible view of the world. You hear this non stop din of Jews surviving the holocaust, but you never hear Asians trading on their experiences, whether it was the Koreans with Japan, the Vietnamese culling their own, the Mung being genocided by communists or the Cambodians in their holocaust which was not Jewish elders selling the poor Jews to work camps, renamed death camps, but instead was the communists systematically raping, robbing and putting bullets into the brains of 3 million innocent people in the killing fields.
All of that obviously made Rany a better soul. She makes no excuses and does not trade on the personal horrors of her life, she is a woman of Proverbs 31 who is always there, always can be counted on and always is someone the Viking and Baby Girl are most proud of.
I hope that this came out right, as I believe God moved me to share this today, because there are such good people in this world who are 10,000 times better to make up for all the sub par snowflakes always blaming someone or God for their hangnail. It is hard to be there for the elderly and it is the true mark of responsibility to always be there for a parent. I know how frustrating and infuriating it is with my fraud sisters who only came to the funeral with their families, because people would wonder why they were not there, and it would expose further the fact they were never there for mom.
I know in that struggle how much it meant to mom to have someone she could count on, even if the situation was not good, so I know that the elderly women that Rany is caring for appreciate her as someone they can count on, as their worlds shrink and they become more childlike and dependent. It is far more difficult parenting a parent, than it ever is for raising a child.
That is why she deserves recognition, for all the people who are doing this faithfully. I am grateful to the Viking for his notes as Rany helped us in knowing we were not alone. She was not aware of the care she was giving us and for that we thank her, as we thank all the other people in our same situation.
Sincerely, LC and the Tiger Lily.
agtG
