As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.
Most of you have things you are thankful for. I on the other hand, sort of have an existence where an atomic bomb goes off in my pussy, and I think, "Well that cures the vaginal yeast infection".
I take my good times where they come.
:Like today, we were over at the Uncles, telling him we have kicked him to the Eskimo iceberg, when the phone rings, and he hangs up laughing.
I heard the part about, "La'me just got here", and that was it, as I was putting away the ice flow supplies.
Turns out it was Stage 4 Aunt. Uncle always tells the story that 3 years ago, she got diagnosed with cancer and was told she had like 2 months to live. Well it was like 6 months, but he embellishes.
I heard that high doses of tumeric and whatever is in tumeric handles cancer on Coast to Coast AM, but Aunt Stage 4 chose the chemo cocktail and as she has piles of money, which she is not spending, but I guess you are paying for her treatment, she has been alive now 3 years.
Christian Wilde reported on the health benefits of turmeric.
Uncle continued that her first cancer was in lower lung, and now it took the elevator to the top floor and is in the upper lung. That probably needs an explanation in, cancer 1 has mutated, and likes the chemo cocktail and is now a new cancer in being cancer 2 of the penthouse suite of the lung, and while Aunt is taking chemo once a week or something that Uncle was saying, I would conclude I have her prognosis in the grim reaper is closing in.
I suppose that the money doctors could do a Ruth Bader Ginsburg on Aunt, but I doubt they are going to be making it to Double Jeopardy phrased in the form of a question.
My prayer is simple in Aunt repents and writes out a big check to make up for being a real asshole to me. I did not use asshole with God, but He knows what I mean as He knows this horrid woman.
The reason Uncle knew so much is my sister and her husband were out lurking around Sunday, giving Uncle the shits, as I scented Pepto today when we got there, in they bring shit he can't eat and he gets the shits.
The reason sister knows all about Aunt is she is the goddaughter, and Aunt has left her like 10 grande in the will, so sister hangs on her like an orphan on the nipple.
I really wanted to tell Aunt something like, "You know Aunt, you are a real bitch and whey you die, I won't be going to your funeral as you are a real asshole. You never went to my dad's funeral and never went to the mothers. Never heard shit from you, and you know something Aunt, you don't like me, because I have been honest in what an asshole you are, unlike my sister who is a lying bitch like you, but she won't be going to your funeral either, as it is all about money.
So Aunt, how about changing your will to, "If my goddaughter does not attend my funeral, she doesn't get shit from me", that will prove what kind of dumb shit you are and always have been, and that I was right as rain about all of you."
Most people think Stage 4 is a license to have pity, but not me, I view it just as another crip to dig the spurs in if you have the chance to set things right.
As they gave the old girl 6 months last time, I figure they are nuking her to glean the last coin from her and she will be have the arm pits slit, blood drained and the hose up the gut, with lips sown shut around next may. Be easier to get through a shitty winter with her on her way out, as that woman really put the soul torture on her oldest daughter.
See I know that secret too. Yes Aunt when out west and played hide the weenie with a short little squat and got pregnant. Came back and the love of her life proposed to her, and she could not say I DO, being preggo and all, so she cried, and then punished the shit out of her little girl. I liked that girl and always have. She got her tube tied as she never wanted to have children as her mother made her suffer so much.
Instead her second daughter, the one who got arrested allowing meth lab to be run out of her garage, and fats around the chairs, in acting like a Christian, is Aunt's favorite. That kid is a real piece of Freudian nutcase. I was told my cousins lost her when they were here. Apparently she started bawling, disappeared, had drank too much whiskey and passed out in the car with it running. When you need a bad exhaust system, the car industry never comes through for you.
She treated me like shit, but at least Uncle's youngest son now understands why no one likes that hose bag.
So I do know the future. Aunt will be dead thinking her shit does not stink. She hung up the phone today, because she did not want me knowing she is on her way out. Think of it, little ole me is intimidating her, and when she is dead, #2 will be rolling around the casket, probably weaving a funeral bouquet into some kind of necklace or wedding dress, and her emphysema old man, will not be able to control her, she will run with the same bad element she is prone to, and somehow the trust fund will disappear down a dope hole, as some beaner brains her in some canyon.
I tell you can Thanksgiving get any better than when it is God's avenging someone? Sure I pray as God says about Aunt repenting. I stuck it up her ass though when she was here and hiding in the bathroom as she was too good to use the porta potties Uncle had got for the crowds at the reunion, as I told Uncle that I loved him. Floored the old boy, but it sort of Holy Ghost came out and I know that nosy old bitch heard it, and that has stuck up her ass. Yes the rare gem of La'me actually acknowledges you, and all Aunt gets is the fat sister with the obnox husband, who no one likes.
Yes Aunt, repent, let them sins be remembered, sins of stealing my dad's piggy bank and all of his coins. Sins of funerals past, and sins of all what you are, and may you box up one pile of cash and overnight it to the one person you should be making amends to.
One of the most stupid, nasty women on the planet has two Stage 4's operating. God is good in His Love. Like last year about this time, TL was showering and the mother was gloating at me about petting the Poot. I told the mother, "You are playing with fire", as I know that look on Poot's face which says, "I let you pet me. It is OVER and if you do it one more time, I will nail your ass".
Yes next moment and the Puntz had fanged the mother to a bloody hand. No need for "I told you so", I just smiled inside. 18 hours later she was dead.
Yes Thanksgiving is such a happy time in the Brier Patch.
Oh and until the above does not shock you, you ain't yet begun to understand what the Christian walk is.
I still know it is better to have me as one hell of a friend, than one hell of an enemy.
Yes mam, carved to the bone.
Nuff Said
agtG
