Wednesday, May 25, 2016

My Kind of Vice President

As another Lame Cherry exclusive in matter anti matter.

I really feel remorse that America in Vice Presidents have degraded so very much, since the contested election of Vice President Dick Johnson AKA Richard Mentor Johnson by the United States Senate with Martin Van Buren on the Democratic ticket.

This is the kind of Vice President Americans could be proud of.

Dick Johnson was of pioneer stock in the great American wilderness and made a bundle selling land to settlers. He had a real talent though in having sex with quadroons........that would be slaves who are one quarter black and three quarters white.

He first took up with Julia Chinn an octoroon, or 1/8th Negress he inherited on the death of his father, and had two daughters by her, who he gave his name.
Julia died of the fever and Dick Johnson grieved over the death of his common law wife, but had white men marry his daughters.

He next took up with another family slave, but she ran off with another man. So Johnson auctioned her off and sold her down river. He then took up with her slave sister, without any more complications.

Dick Johnson liked wearing a red vest and tie, and was quite well known for it. He also liked bragging about being the man who killed the Indian terrorist Tecumseh in battle. No one countered the claim, and it did him well to making him Vice President on the Democratic ticket.

Johnson even had a meme he wrote for people to chant as he was so popular.

Rumpsey dumpsey, rumpsey dumpsey Colonel Johnson killed Tecumseh!

Upon his election, the great panic of 1837 hit America, and the Vice President immediately disappeared from Washington to open a tavern and spa, where he personally managed to great delight, the chicken and egg purchasing of the outlet and the selling of watermelons.

Somewhere in this Dick Johnson proposed to invade America, or the Great American Desert, where he would personally lead an expedition to find the chasm leading into the Hollow Earth, so that his army would vanquish the inner earth, and all of its peoples and lands.

Now I ask you, would you not vote for a man, born in the American wilds, made his fortune, went off to fight in the War of 1812, went off to fight Indian terrorists and shot the Osama bin Laden of his day, made a meme about it get to be Vice President, and then took up with quadroons in a real inter racial mixing, and when one of them preferred another dick to his dick, Dick sold her off for her ingratitude, and then took up with her sister who he owned too.

A Great Depression hits, and Dick leaves Washington as his business is more important than America's business, and takes up buying chickens and selling watermelons..............oh and he wants to raise an army to lead an invasion to conquer the inner earth and all of those peoples.

That is my kind of Democrat, as they just do not make them like that anymore. Crazy Biden is just brain dead compared to a man like Dick Johnson.

If only America had embraced their Vice President, instead of throwing him off the ticket, so the Whig's whipped Van Buren and took over. Yes America would have been a great place if it had only had President Dick Johnson around, sexer of quadroons, killer of terrorists, seller of melons, buyer of eggs, and leader of the inner earth expeditionary force to conquer those lands.

We can all say NUFF SAID after that.